Jack Johnson
KEY ISSUES
Three cent titanium tax
Against those things that everybody hates.

John Jackson
KEY ISSUES
Three cent titanium tax
Agrees with everything you just said.

You decide.

It all started last night. A friend and I were leaving a bar on foot as we had gotten drunker than expected. Neither of us was use to walking and breathing at the same time and these chores became more challenging thanks to the alcohol sloshing through our blood stream.

We both knew that we would need to take a short cut if we were going to make it home with enough energy to partake in certain acts that we both desperately yearned for, but could later blame on the alcohol if said indiscretions were made public.

The alcohol clouded our judgement and we cut through an alley even though this area had a bad reputation. A shadowy figure in the distance caused us to freeze like statues. Statues that sway drunkenly.

I sobered up quickly as the man reached his hand into his jacket pocket. I knew what was coming and I knew I had a better chance of survival if I cooperated. He slowly drew his hand back out and relief swept over my body. My friend and I laughed openly and the stranger joined our laughter.

I could describe what he pulled out for ever and still couldn't convey the hilarity. This picture tells the story far greater than I could.